Day 4

Working in an accounting office, I don't get much chance to blog during the day during tax season. The bossman had no appointments this afternoon so he left. So here I am.

The first couple of days have been pretty easy. My mind is set on the goal. My ass is set on the toilet because, holy cow, THE WATER! I'm very busy at work so eating is actually difficult to do during the day right now.

Nights are different. Nighttime has always been my tough time. I am a night eater. I could go all day, not eat and proceed to eat all night long. And, of course, not good stuff.

On Day 2 I mentioned I was hungry but wasn't sure if I would eat. I did eat a granola bar. I noted it on My Fitness Pal but not here. I was still well under my calories. Last night I was hungry and was only at 1158 calories. I could have eaten something; my challenge calories are 1900, My Fitness Pal told me I should get at least 1200 calories or I would put my body in "starvation mode" (tell me, do they really think a 317 pound person is going to starve?). Anyway, I could have eaten something, but... I was afraid to. I was afraid that if I ate something I would continue to eat. And eat. And eat. So I didn't eat anything.

So far today:

103 of 150 ounces fluid

1 granola bar (160 calories)
1 chicken salad sandwich (169 for chicken salad, 140 for bread- 309 total)
Total so far- 469 calories

I have another granola bar with me that I'll probably eat shortly. I've read mixed opinions about granola bars; some people think they are a good choice, some think they are a bad choice. I like the crunchy apple crisp ones but I only buy then when they are on sale so when this box is gone, that's the last until next sale. I'd better come up with a healthy, portable alternative quick.

How did I get to be 42 years old and not figure this shit out?