I let the fat girl do my thinking earlier in the week.
Losing Bernice threw me for a loop, I really did not expect to have to make that decision. I really just thought she had a virus or allergies or something relatively easy to deal with. It was awful.
I was sad, depressed, and trying to hold it together for the kids. I ate ziti. Then I ate pretzels. Then I stopped myself with a "wtf do you think you're doing?" It's scary how easy it was to slip right into carbing it up in a vain effort to feel better, or rather, to not feel at all.
Tuesday I rode the Schwinn Airdyne stationary torture machine. And by torture I mean boredom. Even with a previously unseen Big Bang Theory on the tube I was B O R E D. I rode 6.4 miles in a half an hour. I repeated this last night. Tonight my ass is killing me. Not my calves or thighs or arms from the moving handlebars- my ass.
After reading some stuff Norma, Susie and others have posted regarding weight/strength training, I know I need to do this kind of exercise. Mother's Day is coming and the go to gift of chocolate truffles are completely off limits. I will be "suggesting" to my husband that the girls could get me a kettlebell and some hand weights.
The Fit Girl is going to be doing the thinking around here.
Again, SO very sorry about Bernice. I was so saddened to hear from you that she was not well and very upset when I read what had happened. I've only been a dog parent for two years but there really is nothing like that puppy love. She was an adorable thing, too!
ReplyDeleteGood luck getting started on a new workout adventure!
I know how hard it is to unexpectedly lose a pet, I went through something similar. I think you are doing great, all things considered. I'm proud of you for getting on that bike. I have to amp up my exercise lately, as well. I've been so overwhelmed with things going on these past couple of weeks that I feel like I'm in a fog.
ReplyDelete@Norma- thank you. You get so attached to the furballs. She was so sweet.
ReplyDelete@Mina- thank you too. I know what you mean about being in a fog. Ugh, hopefully things will look up for all of us!
Life happens to all of us and sometimes our goals get lost in the grief, stress & busy-ness (how ya spell that?)of it all. Grief is so hard to deal with, especially when you have to keep it in check for everyone else.
ReplyDeleteYou didn't let the fat girl way of thinking take over for too long and you are back on track. That is awesome! You will start feeling strong & confident as soon as you pick up the weights! I know I do and I've only been doing it for less than a month!
The fatgirl is a bully and bullies only thrive when we give them attention. But bullies also know our weaknesses and worm their way in when we are at our lowest. I'm sorry for your loss, I hope time eases your pain.
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